Online dating is an incredibly effective way to meet new people, and to open the doors to different types of people you may never have considered before. However, if you’ve only just come out of a relationship it’s essential you time your entry to online dating right. You’ll only end up hurting more if you attempt to force something you’re just not ready for.
Try online dating…
Once you have let go of the past
If you’ve been burned during a relationship it can be incredibly tempting to rush online, create a profile, and find someone to take your mind off things. After all, isn’t revenge a dish best served online? Well, no actually. Who are you really going to end up hurting if you connect with similarly vulnerable singletons and promise them emotions you’re not yet ready to experience? There are no winners here. Take a little time away from romance to heal; only when you can accept the break up and acknowledge that you’re ready to move forward, should you proceed. Don’t ever be tempted to get into online dating for revenge, financial security, or as a short-term fix for loneliness; you’ll only end up hurting yourself, and potential matches, in the process.
When you can be honest about what you’re looking for
Sure, online dating is a great way to meet people you’d never considered before, but it’s always a good idea to think about what you want from a relationship before taking the plunge. Are you looking for friendship? Do you crave something a little more serious? Despite telling yourself that you’re looking for a breath of fresh air we all have a type that we return to – and that’s not always a bad thing. Is there a particular personality type you get on best with? What characteristics do you admire? Answering such questions will help you narrow the field once you’ve created your profile. This process works both ways, of course. As well as being honest about what you’re looking, you must be honest about who you are, what you like, and what you’re not so keen on. Rediscover your sense of self, and you can search for a new partner with confidence.
When you have the time to reply to messages
Are you ready to share your life, or even a portion of the evening with someone else? Despite its convenience, online dating can take up an awful lot of time – particularly if you’re determined to do it right. Not only will you need to spend time perfecting that profile and choosing an image, but you’ll want to dedicate whole hours to browsing profiles, crafting responses, and plucking up the courage to make the first move. If you’re happiest unwinding in front of the television or with a good book, and find yourself going whole days without checking emails, the chances are you’re not quite ready for the demands of online dating just yet.
So, when is the best time to find love?
According to Match.com, and numerous other dating sites, peak dating season occurs between Christmas Day and Valentine’s Day. Indeed, Match.com reports a surge of anything up to 60% during this time, meaning the pool of suitable singletons is never larger than it is at this time. So, why is this? Christmas, traditionally, is a time for family, and so it’s little wonder that so many single people start to think about spending their lives with somebody else at this time. The start of a new year, and the threat of another Valentine’s Day spent alone could also be blamed – or thanked – for such a spike. There’s nothing like a new year beginning to tease a new relationship, after all.
Of course, only you know when you’re going to be ready to put out the feelers to find love again. Don’t rush yourself, or you’ll only end up regretting your decision – and potentially hurting others in the process. Take a deep breath and think about this; are you ready to find love?
